A friend of mine who doesn’t drink beer brought me four cases of Pabst the other day. Pabst sponsored his book party and he ended up with all this extra hooch, probably because no one really wants to drink that swill. Now a whole mess of Milwaukee’s Worst is sitting in my fridge and staring me in the face. I think I may just pour the junk out. I mean, Pabst is awful, and gives you an immediate hangover. On the other hand, it’s free, and in abundance. And so I’m at the horns of a dilemma. What would you do? Donate it to a homeless guy? Drink it, and suffer the consequences?

Too much work to do, not enough time to do it, and not enough interest to care. Why didn’t I train to be a rodeo clown?