It is undeniable that Prince, aka the Artist Formerly Known as the Artist Formerly Known as Prince, earned his induction into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame for the countless amazing songs that he has written.

It is also undeniable that his latest song is the worst thing he’s ever released. And that includes “My Name Is Prince.” I never thought he’d commit an atrocity greater than that.

According to Fox 9 in Minneapolis, the diminutive musician penned the offending track, “Purple and Gold,” as a way of promising certain victory for the Minnesota Vikings in their tough NFC Championship matchup on Sunday against the New Orleans Saints. “I saw the future,” said Prince.

But in my experience, something this terrible — and even Prince fanatics seem to understand how bad it is — can only herald doom. Which is why I predict the following: The Vikings will lose on Sunday because Prince wrote this horrible, horrible song.

Read the ridiculous lyrics and hear the crazy song below.

Purple and Gold lyrics
the veil of the sky draws open
the roar of the chariots touch down
we r the ones who have now come again
and walk upon water like solid ground
as we approach the throne we won’t bow down
this time we won’t b denied

raise every voice and let it b known
in the name of the purple and gold

we come in the name of the purple and gold
all of the odds r in r favor
no prediction 2 bold
we r the truth if the truth can b told
long reign the purple and gold

the eyes say ready 4 battle
no need 4 sword in hand
we r all amped up like a rock n roll band
ready 2 celebrate every score
ready 2 fight the elegant war
ready 2 hear the crowd roar

that’s what we came 4
and so much more
in the name of the purple and gold

r spirits may b tired
r bodies may b worn
but since this day is r destiny
r history – that’s y we must b
4ever strong as the wind that blows the Vikings’ horn
in the name of the purple and gold

CHORUS

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