So, you’re going to Comic-Con 2009, the sold-out, weekend-long geek hootenanny that kicked off at the San Diego Convention Center today. Congrats! Here are the five facial expressions you will inevitably make as you hike from event to event.
1. DETERMINATION
What the look says: “How am I going to get from the Burn Notice panel discussion, which ends at 3:30 p.m. and features my man Bruce Campbell, to the can’t-miss Q+A with James Cameron about Avatar, which starts at 3 p.m.? Without a time machine, I mean? Sheer force of will, that’s how. But hell, it would be pretty cool if I had a time machine.”
2. SURPRISE
What the look says: “What!? Is there really going to be an event at which a Halo honcho takes a look at what’s in store for Master Chief and his video-game cronies!? Well, I better take a look at what’s in store for my pants, then, because I’m liable to crap them.”
3. CONFUSED INDIFFERENCE
What the look says: “Wait — did I just hear you right? All they’re showing at the Tron 2.0 session is the same teaser trailer I downloaded by bit torrent three weeks ago? I don’t get it.”
4. HATRED
What the look says: “Jesus. Will these damn Twilight-loving losers with their stupid fake fangs and their lame goth vampire outfits please just get the heck out of my way? I mean, it’s like they don’t even want to get in the line I’ve heard is already forming at noon for the 4 o’clock Buck Rogers 80th Anniversary session going on over in Room 4. Why are they even here!?”
5. GRATITUDE
What the look says: “First I thought it was the Q+A with Peter Jackson about his upcoming sci-fi movie, District 9, where he talked about what’s going on with The Hobbit. Then I thought it was the screening of the pilot for ABC’s reimagining of V. But the premiere of Watchmen: The Director’s Cut that was bundled with a discussion with Mark Hamill about his voice-over work on the upcoming Batman: Arkham Asylum? That’s totally when I knew that spending $1300 on a flight to San Diego and five nights at a hotel was worth it.”
John Sellers 
Great post, John. It’s funny because I think a lot of us, at different times in our lives, were only a step or two away from tilting over to the dark side of utter comic nerd geekdom. I know I was.
Good to see you on True/Slant.
Thanks, Austin. And yeah, I am so perpetually close to turning into the “hatred” guy pictured here, especially when Lost is on hiatus.
Whoa, wait, so what’s going on with The Hobbit?
I’m not sure, but I’m glad they’re making two separate movies out of it. I sort of wish they’d break it into 20 three-hour movies, so that I’d have a new installment to look forward to every year pretty much for the rest of my life.