Death at One’s Elbow

Blame it on the rain.

I have decided that, contrary to the opinion I held when I first opened my eyes this morning, I will not venture outside today. Not once. Instead, I will stay ensconced in T-shirt and pajama bottoms.

The whole day. Without interruption.

If I had a stamp lying around that said “CERTIFIED SHUT-IN” I’d stamp that sucker right on my forehead. God knows, I deserve it.

And god knows I earned it. Breathing easy today after dispatching a mound of work. But I’m only breathing easy because I’ve also put one of those Breathe Right strips over the bridge of my nose.

This just in: I will be living in the great state of Michigan from October 2 to 20. If anyone has any suggestions of what to do while I’m in Grand Rapids besides take care of my mom’s two kittens and eat pizza subs from J.T.’s PIzza Depot, I’d be much obliged. Then again, I’m heading there to finish up my book, so you’d actually be doing me a great disservice informing me of area happenings. But nothing ever stops you people.

One thing I will almost certainly doing? Sleeping. Another? Not watching the Detroit Tigers in the playoffs. And? Going to see Bob Pollard’s new band, Boston Spaceships, play at my old haunt The Blind Pig in Ann Arbor. (I initially typed that out as The Bling Pig, which would also be a great name for a concert hall, albeit for hip-hop acts only.) But other than that, I got nothing.

I chipped a tooth while flossing! I thought flossing was supposed to be good for you?