I’m speaking to Brian Johnson, the lead singer of AC/DC in about an hour. Apparently he provides a voice in a video game coming out this fall, and it’s up to me to get the poop. And so I must resort to that old, time-saving tactic today: an excerpt from the lost third-grade classic “My (First) Book of Stories by John Sellers.”

“The Big Fight”

Once there was an owl man and an octopus man. They had a fight and it would probably be good because the octopus man had eight tentacles and sharp teeth. The owl man had a razor sharp beak and very sharp claws. So they fought and they fought, but all of a sudden only one came out alive. And that was the octopus man. The octopus man won for a change.

[AJS note: Should I read this story to Brian Johnson? Maybe AC/DC will write a song about the octopus man and the owl man in the same way that Rush wrote about By-Tor and the Snowdog.]

WHY I’M ANGRY TODAY

Walking to get coffee, I overheard a perturbed woman say “Well, he’s a Mr. Johnny Come Lately, isn’t he?”