The Pope apparently arrives in the U.S. today. Apparently there is a frenzy surrounding his appearance.

But all I care about is the Popemobile. Man, I wish I owned that sucker. I’d stick a cardboard cut-out of Mr. Spock in the back of it and drive around Brooklyn honking like all holy hell. People would throw confetti and cheer as Spock stoicly stood there and glowered at the hoi polloi. It would be beautiful.

WHY I’M ANGRY TODAY
Dirty shoes.