There is no higher authority on the art of devising great titles than the man behind the zombie-themed song “Re: Your Brains” and the album Our Bodies, Ourselves, Our Cybernetic Arms. That man, of course, is musician Jonathan Coulton.

Given the 38-year-old Internet sensation’s prowess at coming up with such inventive nuggets, we figured he’d be the perfect companion on our admittedly ridiculous pop-culture quest: to preview this fall’s crop of new television shows solely by their titles. And we figured right. “Luckily,” said Coulton upon agreeing to the task, “I don’t know anything about television.” Perfect, indeed.

Here’s how our preview works: 1) We give Coulton the title of a series.* 2) He offers up what he imagines the premise of that show might be.** 3) We tell him the program’s true premise. 4) He sums up the show’s chance for survival. 5) TV executives everywhere collectively shiver.

Only time will tell how Coulton—whose latest opus, Best. Concert. Ever., culls from his shockingly frequent live shows—fares as a one-day television critic. But we’re never going to bet against a guy who allegedly killed one of John Hodgman’s cats. Continue reading →